Bad Life Pro Tips That Likely Won't Help

Author image for Eric Lund
Eric Lund
Nov 5, 2021 11:00 PM EDT

Always remember: just because someone is willing to offer advice, does not men that advice is good. It could just as well be some dumb and bad life pro tips to not do. We'd all like to be more successful, attractive and intelligent, but that actually requires work. Hilariously bad and dumb life pro tips to avoid aren't exactly helpful, but they're something.

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  • 01
    Font - Lowering Expectations aleena @taxtherichh pro tip: if you got strict parents start rebelling young so you set and lower expectations otherwise you're gonna be 20 asking your mum if you can dye your hair
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    Font - If you die and get cremated, you can be put into an hourglass and still be included in family game night X
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    Rectangle - If you glue a dead wasp to your palm, you can smack your boss on the back of the head as hard as you want and act like you saved him.
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    Rectangle - Life hack: If someone offers you some Doritos, sneeze into the bag and they'll just let you have them all.
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    Font - V V Dr. Mike P. Moffatt l @MikePMoffatt Free tip for job hunters: When the Census comes, tell them 125,000 people live in your home. Based on that population, your place will become its own electoral district and you can elect yourself to Parliament.
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    Font - Sara K. Runnels @omgskr Pro-tip: Getting 8 hours of sleep can help cut your phone time down to just 16 hours a day
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    Font - : Anonymous Who else here beat the system? 01/04/21(Mon)20:48:58 No.61714257 >be me >turn 18 last summer >start getting credit card offers in the mail >get every card I possibly can, Visa, AmEx, all the big ones >get cards for specific gas station 73 KB JPG chains, stores, phone providers, all that >end up with about 15 cards total, max them all out >recent purchases include a PS5 and a new TV >have about $25k in debt across all the cards >don't pay any monthly bills >get late notices, to
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    Font - Bryan With a Why @doublewenis Don't embarrass a guy by telling him his fly is open in public. Just be a man, walk over there, and slowly zip it up for him.
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    Font - YS @NYINLA2121 If you cook your kale with a little coconut oil it makes it easier to scrape it into the garbage. Follow me for more cooking tips. 2:18 PM · Apr 8, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 588 Retweets 79 Quote Tweets 6,465 Likes
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    Font - health tip: force yourself to get up from your desk every 30 minutes by becoming a smoker 06:53 · 4/28/21 · Twitter Web App
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    Font - vicki @vickixlee_ just get that tattoo, your parents are already disappointed in you
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    Font - aynrandy HD (hot diarrhoea) @AynRandy if you're bored you can simply close your eyes and rotate a cow in your mind. it's free and the cops can't stop you
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    Rectangle - Shower Thoughts @showerthoughtsz if you rob a store naked as a minor, no one can watch the security footage without committing a crime
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    Plant - Andrew Nadeau @TheAndrewNadeau Millennials, quit whining. I paid off $150,000 in student loans and own a $400,000 home, because I SAVE. It's not that hard. I |-Make coffee at home -Bus instead of Uber -Shop sales -Had parents pay off my loans & buy me a house because l'm daddy's special boy |-Got Hulu with ads
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    Organism - shenanigans @ahsanwise Whenever I have kids, I'm gonna ask my lady to plan the delivery at 15 months instead of 9. Babies before 6 months age make no sense so we're just gonna skip that part.
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    Food - COOKING HACK: if you put too much water in your rice, toss a few phones in there
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    Font - A VIK @Vik60421368 Proud dad tweet. Taught my 3 Y.O about investing this morning. He could either have half a gummy prior to nursery or he could leave it there and have 2 in the afternoon. He chose the latter. So proud! I ate them both once he left though because #volatility
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    Food - If u want free pees then go to Asda fall and hurt your arm and go to costumer services and ask for a ice pack and they will give u free pees :) CHAT
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    Sky - slate @PleaseBeGneiss you can just put PhD next to your name. no one checks
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    Font - derek Follow @eedrk Spraypainting "CHEATER" on my car to make it look like l'm sexually active
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    World - ceo of loveland frog @lildarkvixen yall ever notice how almost all laws say "He or she" in their clauses which means that I, a person who uses they/them, is above the law and cannot be arrested 4:59 PM Oct 22, 2019 Twitter for Android 18.4K Retweets 92.2K Likes
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    Vertebrate - The year on your coins is a use by date ETH HII ELIZA AUST
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    Font - perpetual meh @SortaBad If someone asks you to watch their plants, just let them die and they'll never ask you to watch them again. This also works with kids. 11:40 AM - Sep 11, 2015 · Twitter Web Client 194 Retweets 2 Quote Tweets 737 Likes
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    Font - Mayne @Tradermayne How I made it $150k trading. 1- took a small loan of $300k from my dad. 2 - put it into high risk shit coins 3- lost half, got scared, decided it was ime to cash out 4 - blocked my dads number 5 - net profit of $150k secured
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    Kitchen utensil - GUY'S GUIDE TO WASHING PANS 1. Place in hot, soapy water 2. Tell yourself it needs to soak 3. Go watch TV 4. Wake up and go to work
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tips bad idea jokes life hacks advice lol dumb funny shitty life hacks
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